Christmas has passed. We’ve had a month of parties, eating, family, and over indulging. Now many people’s attention have turned to getting their life back in shape. They are thinking about shaping up their bodies, their finances, their relationships, and putting right all the things that have escaped them so that the new year is a new beginning. Underlying all that is the search for purpose. If this is you, you’re in luck! Here is your purpose revealed!
If you are looking for an article that will tell you how to find what you love, make money at what you love, or do something that will make you happy, you’re in for a diversion. Those things are your “what.” That’s a small picture focus. That’s the least important part.
There are two elements to figuring out your purpose. They are How and What. Starting with the What is likely to end in failure. We will look at all that, but first we have to look at the big picture.
Your big picture purpose is the same as it is for everyone. Your purpose is to Know Yourself; Love Yourself; Be Yourself; and Share Yourself.
Most people go on the quest to find their purpose when what they are really in search of is who they are. Your purpose is a reflection of who you are. It’s is not who you are. Don’t mistake the reflection for the real thing. When you know yourself, your reflection will be in alignment with who you are.
So who are you? Are you a mother, brother, boss, American, doctor, artist, or champion? No, those are your roles. You are not your roles. Are you brave, quiet, industrious, creative, or loyal? No, those are your traits. You are not your traits. Are you a patriot, a Republican, Catholic, feminist, or racist? No, these are your ideologies. Many people create an identity around these types of things. If you stripped a person of all of them, he’d still be here. He’d be undiminished.
So, what is left? That is who you are. When you know that, you have gold. If you do nothing else with your life, spend your time here. Explore your body. Put it through its paces. Challenge your mind. Let your spirit out to play. Find out who you are outside of your roles, traits, and ideologies.
Remember when you were a kids and you could ride your bike all day long simply for the joy of it? You could do it day after day and still find new things to discover. There were no worries about paying bills, being late, or whether or not someone would still like you tomorrow. It was just you, maybe a friend, all of nature, and that moment. Indulge in yourself in the same way. Through loving attention and play, you will find yourself just like you knew who you were before society’s programming started.
All children are born with the capacity to love themselves. And then at some point, it is programmed right out of them. Usually it starts with good intentions with things like “Be a good girl or Santa won’t bring you any presents.” Whoa! If my behavior doesn’t meet with Santa’s approval, I am a bad person who doesn’t deserve love? Yikes! Or maybe, “Don’t do that. It’s a sin, and you don’t want to go to Hell.” Whew! Now the stakes are really high! Or sometimes people are reared by people or in environments where people don’t see the light in themselves or others. Abusive language, violence, and boundary violations are a routine part of life. This sends the message that life is cheap. I am worthless.
Discipline is not a bad thing. Believing in God is not a bad thing. The message that we’re not worthy, we’re not good enough, or we’ve let someone down is damaging. It may have all been done with the best intentions. Still, if you find that you are not expressing self-acceptance and self-love, don’t cry. Don’t blame. Just fix it. It’s just a function of programming. What is taught can be untaught.
Love Yourself and Be Yourself are two sides of the same coin. If you are not expressing yourself truly and fully, you’re not really loving yourself. This is not an intellectual exercise. You are not something to be understood. You are something to be expressed.
When you are expressing things that hurt yourself or other people, that is not who you really are. That is a function of programming, ignorance (what you don’t know), or a lack of skill. Use that feedback to identify what you need. Then get rid of the programming, educate yourself, and grow your skills.
For example, I participate in a forum where someone asked if it was possible to rear children without yelling. Many people responded by saying not to worry about it. Some people are just made that way. What? Some people are more vocal, passionate, emotional, and expressive than others. Yelling isn’t a byproduct of any of those things. You can be all of those things without yelling.
Yelling is about asserting dominance. It’s a way of forcing the other person to hear you. When you are centered, there is no need to dominate. You cannot dominate someone and feel peace within yourself. Thoughts and behaviors that do not honor all life are not reflections of your true self. You are love and light. We are all connected. What you send out comes back to you. So when you are not reflecting love and light, it just means that you are having a bad moment, you need to deprogram, learn, or practice new ways of being.
Does this mean you don’t have a dark side? No, everything is dual in nature. There is no light without darkness. However, the more comfortable you are with the dark, the less destructive it becomes. If you can accept it, you can live in the middle with balance. It is there that you will find your true self.
It’s one thing to be yourself when you’re all alone. It’s quite another to bring your wonderful self out into the world for all to enjoy. It takes courage, but if you can do this, there is no stopping you from living your purpose. (Hint: you are your gift. Give it away).
Now, this isn’t carte blanche for you to be a raging narcissist. No, you still have to realize that we all have a purpose. We’re all beautiful people who need to shine. This is just a way to bring your sparkle into a sky full of other sparkling beings. So, continue to respect boundaries.
If you do all this, the rest will fall into place. I know it’s easy for me to say and hard to believe when you are not yet there, so I will give you the the complete How and What formula.
Know Yourself, Be Yourself, Love Yourself, and Share Yourself is How. How is a spirit centered practice. If you’re spirit isn’t full and balanced, nothing full and balanced will flow from you. You may produce something that is useful and good, but it won’t feel whole. If you are just starting out on living your purpose, it makes the most sense to start here.
Honestly, What doesn’t really figure into the equation. I am addressing it here because that is what most of the “Find Your Purpose” classes or “Find Your Purpose” psychic channelers focus on. Lots of people think they are someone special, and they have to do something spectacular, like find the cure for cancer or save someone’s life, in order to be significant. They want to be told or discover that they really need to write that book, hike the Appalachian trail, marry that man, or rescue orphans in Romania so that they can get out there and do it. Once they do that, they will be fulfilled.
Your purpose is not about doing. It’s about being. You might well do something spectacular, but that’s not your purpose. If you do that big, wonderful, fulfilling thing without knowing who you are, you may continue feeling empty despite it. If you do it when you are living an authentic life, you’ll have your cake and eat it too.
Trust. If you are living fully mindfully, your spirit will take you where you need to be. You will discover all the things that stand in your way of feeling complete. It will be easy and gentle. When you are there, you can create what you need to create, and have the experience you need to experience.
In all the past life regressions I have done, in the past life review, nobody has ever said, “I was born to invent something that would supply the earth with endless clean water, and I failed.” Nobody ever said, “I was born to lead my people out of bondage, and I failed.” No, those things are incidental. It’s always the little things that trip us up: pride, fear, lust, escapism, being controlling, focusing on the material over the relational, anger, or things like that.
Know yourself. Confront your demons. Live in truth, no matter what your mistakes. Love, even if no one seems to love you. The more you love (really love, not giving to get), the more love you will find in the world. Be present. You will find that conquering the barriers to self awareness is a much greater achievement than conquering the world.