Embrace Your Duality

The Law of Duality (or Law of Polarity) tells us that all things have what appears to be an opposite. However, the poles are simply extremes of the same thing. For example, we only know light because there is darkness. We know day because there is night. There is wealth and poverty. Using temperature as an example, we have hot and cold, but where does hot end and cold begin? Is it at ninety degrees? Sixty degrees? There is no real point at which one ends and the other begins because even at the poles, or extremes, each contains the possibility of its opposite.

The Law of Duality is what allows you to have a full experience. We all want happiness, but how would we know it if there were no sadness? Many of us want good health, but could you appreciate it if there were no illness? What about intelligence? If there were no less intelligent folks, how could you experience the intellect?

dualityTo put this to work for you, first you have to recognize that polarity is everywhere. Next, use it for your benefit to make life better. This is making nature work for you instead of working against you because duality is unavoidable. For example, if you perceive that you have failed at something, know that success is possible. It must be because there can be no failure without success. If you are feeling hated, know that love exists too.

What shows up for you is determined by your focus. If my boyfriend breaks up with me, I can see that as a failure and cry my eyes out, or I can see it as a success and decide that a doorway has appeared that can lead me to love elsewhere. Either could be true because they both exist on that continuum.

Choosing to see the bright side doesn’t make you delusional. It makes you happier and more successful. Not because you have more fun, love, or money, but because you have more peace.

Sometimes my clients will say things like, “I had the worst weekend. I stayed in bed all day, ate bon bons, and didn’t even get dressed.” I might respond with something like, “Oh, okay, so you gave in to the urge to rest. That’s great!” It might not seem like a huge success to the person who felt such low energy and motivation that she couldn’t even get up, but there is always something positive about everything.

When you are feeling anything you don’t like, rather than labeling it as something bad, ask yourself, “How is this bad? How is this not bad?” That’s a more honest approach because everything is on a continnum. This also gives you options right away that you might not see if you simply label it as “bad.”

As your awareness grows, your ability to see the extremes in all situations – including your experience of yourself – will also grow. For example, it’s true that you are both the Center of the Universe and also of no consequence. Everything you do affects everything around you because we are all one. The love you share creates more love. The negativity you spew creates more negativity. And yet, we all die. When you die, the world will continue to go on without a hiccup. What you do and what you feel matters immensely, and it matters not at all.

What I hope this realization does for you is to help you see that your mistakes are not that big of a deal. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. And then leave the past in the past and be fully present. All the badness in the world is tolerable if you can maintain the peace inside of you.

The understanding of the Law of Duality may also show up in your experience of the universe. You may get to the point where you can feel yourself in everything. Your consciousness may expand to feel your whole essence fill the entire universe. You are the breeze, each blade of grass, the raindrops, your ancestors, those who are not yet born, the buffalo, the creatures of the sea, the mosquitos, the trees – everything.

And one day, you may experience the Nothing. No thought. No sound. No sensation. No feelings. No memory. Nothing. And the moment your mind registers the Nothing, your thought banishes it and brings everything back into existence again. When you have experienced both these things, you will know your eternal self. When you’ve been there, so much of what you fear will lose its power.

What!, you say.  I know that went a little fast. Let’s get into a little physics here. When you collide a Positron (e+) (a positively charged electron) with an Electron (e-) (a negatively charged particle) in a laboratory setting, there is an explosion. Both are annihilated and out of that annihilation, gamma-ray photons are created. And what is that? Light.

So, said another way: when positive and negative come together, they create light. Light is a metaphor for love.

To bring it back down to earth, when you experience a negative (example: I just lost my job) and see its opposite (example: and now I am free to do what I really want to do), a positive, the result is annihilation. Out of that births love.

It may sound incomprehensible to you. It may some like total gibberish – until you experience it. Once you do, your entire world will change and nothing will change. You will understand the Law of Duality and be able to make it work for you effortlessly in small, mundane ways, and in the big ways that touch the world.

Most of us live in the poles, fearing darkness and seeking light. There is an alternative. When you accept the Destruction (dark) and Creation (light), you can live in love.

Posted in coping, mindfulness, self-help, spirituality and tagged , , , .